Canard Thursday: Merlot Sucks
ca-nard
—noun
[kuh-nard; Fr. kuh-nar]
- a false or baseless, usually derogatory story, report, or rumor.
- Cookery. a duck intended or used for food.
The term probably came from the French phrase: “vendre un canard à moitié”, meaning “to sell half a duck.”
I enjoy wine (a LOT). I enjoy reading about it and talking about it almost as much as drinking it.
Okay, that’s a lie.
But I DO like reading and talking vino. Consequently, I have occasionally been accused of being a wine snob. This is a totally unfounded allegation.
The only wine I have ever refused to drink has been wine that was “corked” or otherwise obviously spoiled, and I can recall fewer than a handful of occasions on which such a near-catastrophe has occurred. (That’s one reason I’m a huge fan of the screw-top, but I digress.)
I enjoy a truly great Gevrey-Chambertin as much as the next poor slob, but I’m perfectly capable of enjoying wine’s humbler exponents just as much. In wine, as in much else, context is everything.Merlot is a terrific, prolific, and useful grape, and it is probably due to its ubiquitousness and popularity that it became fashionable in “winey” circles to diss the varietal. Because Merlot is a relatively hardy and forgiving grape, it is very widely planted, and a lot of wine is made from it. A lot of not-great wine.
That was probably the impetus behind the famous “I am NOT not drinking any fucking Merlot!” scene from the film Sideways:
But even the snootiest of wine-snobs will interrupt her swirl-sniff-sip-n-spit to grudgingly acknowledge its utility as (ahem…) a blending grape. It is one of the holy trinity of great red Bordeaux grapes, along with Cabernet Sauvignon and Cabernet Franc (and to a lesser extent, Petit Verdot, Malbec and Carmenère.)
What wannabe wine snobs who disdain the humble Merlot don’t seem to acknowledge is that most real wine “experts” agree that Merlot can make great wine all by its fat, black-curranty self.
In fact, Château Pétrus, one of the world’s greatest and most expensive wines (the latest released vintage is listed around $3,000/bottle at most auction sites), is made almost entirely of Merlot. (According to the owner, the blend is 95% Merlot, 5% Cabernet Franc.)
Would you drink THAT fucking Merlot, Miles?
